Two prayers....

God's will be done and may He have mercy upon us all.

About Me

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A Catholic who follows Rome & the Magisterium. I'm against gay "marriage", abortion, embryonic stem cell research, euthanasia, human cloning. Altar girls, Communion in the hand, Eucharistic Ministers and "Protestant" music in the Church doesn't bother me at all. A proud American retired submarine sailor. Our borders should be secured with a 10 ft. high fence topped by concertina wire with minefields out to 20 yards on both sides and an additional 10 yards filled with warning signs outside of that Let's get energy independent NOW! Back Israel to the max, stop appeasing followers of the Pedophile Prophet. Pro 2nd Amendment, pro death penalty, Repeal all hate crime legislation. Back the police unless you'd rather call a hippie when everything hits the fan. Get government out of dealing with education, childhood obesity and the enviornment. Stop using the military for sociological experiments and if we're in a war don't micromanage their every move. Kill your television, limit time on the computer and pick up a book. God's will be done and may He have mercy upon us all.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Things I've learned.....

Well it's been over two months since the War Department went back to work and I took on the role of "Mr. Mom". Here are a few things I've learned so far with a few unanswered questions:

1) When you get into a battle of wills with a three year old you've already lost. End of story.

2) Ketchup isn't just a vegetable, it's a major food group.

3) Baby girls have a grip rivalling that of pro wrestlers, especially when they have a handful of chest hair.

4) How can a four year old eat six chocolate covered donuts in one sitting? I'm 6' 3", weigh over 250 lbs. and I can't do that!

5) Each of my three children have a worm hole in their intestines. They all go to an alternate universe consisting entirely of shit. I know this because it's impossible for any one human to be as full of it as they each are.

6) When I started this gig I swore my children wouldn't watch more than one hour of videos a day. HAH! Can someone tell me how to do that and still get the housework done, the meals cooked, laundry washed & folded, etc. ?

7) Speaking of videos, I'm now convinced Barney is the AntiChrist, the Wiggles are the Four Horsemen, Thomas the train engine is the dragon the Whore of Babylon will ride. Who she might be I haven't figured out yet, maybe Captain Feathersword.

8) Allowing a three year old who isn't potty trained to run naked across a living room is always a bad idea.

9) Having three children under the age of five all take a nap at the same time is like finding virginity in a house of prostitution, it's more a useless intellectual exercise than anything else.

Now excuse me, I have to go help someone make teetee in the potty.

8 comments:

MightyMom said...

You are THE Super-Dad!!!!!!


bwahahahahahahah!!!

AIRBORNE POPPA said...

LOL LOL LOL

Hang in there Subvet! You're doing a great job.

Cookie..... said...

ROTFLMAO... Chief...been there...done that...and now I can smile and laugh at you... ;-)

Good read mate....

Penless Thoughts said...

I admire you soooooo much and my hats off to you!!!!! AND a lot of my prayers going your way.
Susan

diana said...

i love #6 - one we stay at home parents can all relate to.

keep up the good work!

Pinky said...

Wow! You have summed it up nicely! Start working on your memoir, Subvet. It'll fly off the shelves. Seriously...it's an awesome concept. A retired Navy man bustin' his butt to take care of three wee ones? Good stuff, good stuff.

Stephanie said...

I bow out of total respect and admiration!

Nereus said...

I don't envy you.
Fatherhood is tough,
Tougher if your home.

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